I recently returned from Washington state where it was in the low 70s. Yes, low 70s. To exchange—in the heat of a southern summer—sweaty beaches for views of snow-capped mountains was soul reviving. 

I gathered with two of my friends whom I used to write with on a regular basis. Back in the day, we gathered once a month and wrote merlot-induced masterpieces birthed from clothing prompts. We started with “bra” and worked our way through an entire wardrobe.  

At the time, one friend was in her 30s, I was in my 40s, and the other two were in their 50s and 60s (see photo). Two grew up southern Baptist, two Catholic. We were conservative and liberal and searching in between. We laughed. We cried. We sometimes yelled. We always loved. Our time together was sacred. Ideal.

Three of us were able to reunite in the Pacific Northwest this summer where one had moved, with the fourth now unable to travel, yet still very present in spirit. Our first day together, we didn’t brush our teeth, shower, or change out of our pajamas until 2:00 pm. We were perfectly fine lounging in the crisp air of a blossoming backyard, soaking in years of “catch up” as if our lives depended on it. It was only the lure of Bellingham’s Village Bookstore that finally kickstarted our first day before it ended. 

Health and Wellness

Retreating for restoration, with a supportive community of friends, is good for the soul. Good for our overall health and wellness. We need time out of our normal realities to keep proper perspective on those realities. Stepping out of my too darn hot Florida heat provided needed focus to contemplate more deeply my upcoming milestone season of 60.

What is too binding? What is more freeing? What is my ideal life?

I have learned that I like to work in waves, pouring much energy into a project and then needing time off. Time to retreat for restoration. And that I do not like to sit behind a computer isolated from the world, for I am an ambivert, needing both time with others and time with self, time to move, time to be still. As much as I love my laptop, it’s not the love of my life. Not to mention its eye strain and propensity toward sedentary days. I must pay attention to all of this. 

And Let There be Love

I also have a deep desire to be the one who encourages and supports. Not the one set-in-her-old-narrow-sad-fearful ways. But the more graceful one who continues to live and learn and most especially to love. And maybe in today’s virtual world, I can be that person from behind a screen, but I know, for me, I would surely die. 

I explored love a lot this past year wondering exactly what love is. I launched a single-series podcast in February on the topic as I interviewed others about self-love, unconditional love, and divine love. It is all these mysterious loves that I believe are deeply important, yet so deeply difficult. (And yet not). Everything comes back to love, an anchoring point of our being. The “better self, better world” of Momentous Living must start here, with love. 

Shifting Focus

And so, because of this milestone movement, it is with great pleasure to announce that Momentous Living is shifting its focus as I personally shift into my season of 60. This focus has to do with a women’s wellness retreat, a men’s prison, and all our stories—yours and mine—that shape us into our uniquely beautiful ideal selves.

More on all this in the coming days and weeks.

But for now, as a tribute to cooler weather, beautiful amazing friends, and the ideal life, I thought it would be fun to share that bra poem I composed in summer 2015 while retreating with two of my ideal writer friends in the Blue Ridge Mountains. It was that trip, nine years ago, that prompted our series of clothesline pieces over a span of many memorable years.

The Ideal Life

Today I went to church 
without a bra. 

I worried
if it were even possible 
to worship 
so freely.

Surely,
biblical ladies
didn’t wear bras
I justified.
Victoria’s Secret 
hadn’t gone public. Yet.

And it was so darn hot
in those Bible towns,
like where I was
sweltering at the foothills 
of the Blue Ridge Mountains
on vacation
from rules and regulations
and social etiquette.

A bra 
made as much sense
as men 
wearing jock straps
to church. 

So binding.
So restricting.
So damn hot.

No,
I needed to be free
to live 
the ideal life
the preacher preached.

“It is from a-buv!
A life entirely surrendered
and yielded 
to God
manifested and magnified
in us.”

Have we trials and temptations?
What a friend we have in Jesus.

Is there trouble anywhere?
What a friend we have in Jesus.

We should never be discouraged.
What a friend we have in Jesus.

Take it to the Lord in prayer.

And I did.

I worshiped
freely
living
the ideal life
the pastor so passionately preached.

Be Momentous! 🌎

What is your ideal life?